This is an actual letter from an Austin,Texas woman sent to the American company Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. It's PC Magazine's 2007 editors' choice for best webmail-award-winning letter:
Dear Mr. Thatcher,
I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.
Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse'? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?
As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behaviour.
You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!
The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants...
...Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.'
Are you ****ing kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable?
Well, did it, James?
FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.
For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer'?
Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bulls**t. And that's a promise I will keep.
Always.
Best,
Wendi Aarons
Austin , TX
16 comments:
OMG.....I agree with her, what woman has a "happy period"!!! I don`t don`t go around dancing and singing either, I get my sword off the wall, lock my door and DARE anyone to enter! Thanks for posting this, I really needed a good laugh! :) :)
Don't you just FEEL the exact same way every time you hear that commercial?
You just KNEW a man came up with the whole "happy period" thing because a woman would NEVER use those two words in the same sentence!
I also had a pretty good laugh going through pictures to post with the article. The top one (the comic book-styled one) still cracks me up ever time I read it. :>
No man with any sense (or experience) would say it, either.
To finalise, Sunday payday loans are a best suggested financial aid which shows lender’s consciousness for their borrowers. Such kind of loans shows lender’s positive attitude towards borrowers and their needs in every situation and know more about our services please visit us weekend payday loans.
http://sundaypaydayloans.directlendersuk.co.uk/
http://12monthloans.directlendersuk.co.uk/
http://weekendpaydayloans.directlendersuk.co.uk/
http://weeklypaydayloans.directlendersuk.co.uk/
Individual to get rid of the situation of financial crisis they can take the help of loans for unemployed no guarantor no fees which don’t include any credit check of people. These are short term in nature. For further information about loans for unemployed no guarantor no fees ,loans for unemployed no fees and no guarantor ,unemployed loans no guarantor, unemployed loans without guarantor please visit
http://www.loansforunemployedgb.co.uk/unemployed-loans-no-guarantor.html
"Excellent"
Thank you for sharing your knowledge and your experiences with us.
100 Pound Instant Decision Loans, 100 Pound Instant Loan
Hi,
Very Very good and usable post. Thank's to share your experience with us. I will try to remember these tips in my blog commenting task.
100 Loans
100 Loan no credit check
Hi,
Very Very good and usable post. Thank's to share your experience with us. I will try to remember these tips in my blog commenting task.
Installment loans
Installment loans bad credit uk
Hello,
The blog was absolutely fantastic! Lots of great information and inspiration, both of which we all need!b Keep 'em coming... you all do such a great job at such
Concepts... can't tell you how much I, for one appreciate all you do!
Thanks
3 Month Loans
3 month loans uk
Hi,
Very Very good and usable post. Thank's to share your experience with us. I will try to remember these tips in my blog commenting task.
The blog was absolutely fantastic! Lots of great information and inspiration, both of which we all need!b Keep 'em coming... you all do such a great job at such Concepts... can't tell you how much I, for one appreciate all you do!
Payday Loans 6 Months
6 Month Pay Day Loans
Hello,
Its good to be here, very nice post, the content is amazing, keep posting friend it will be very helpful for everyone, Thanks for sharing. I really liked it.
Thanks And Regards
12 Month Loans With No Credit Checks
12 Month Loan No Credit Check
Simply awesome Really interesting ,,brilliant post..thanks for sharing...!!!
Among various short term schemes 6 month loans no credit check has proved to be successful as many people find it more comfortable to repay. It helps in providing the instant as well as the timely cash to the people at the time of the need.
http://www.e.6monthloansdirectlenders1hr.co.uk/6-month-loans-no-credit-check.html
The adjustment is one breadth the top absorption ante paid by the able basin of blacklisted borrowers serve as a awning for the few who (in befitting with their able behavior) may be clumsy or afraid to no guarantor loans. The top absorption ante can as well be beheld as the rewards the lenders accord to themselves, for advertisement themselves to such top levels or risk, by lending money to blacklisted borrowers. Huge aegis requirements: in a lot of cases, car loans admission to be anchored with actual assets, no guarantor loans. These are assets that are meant to be auctioned, if the borrowers are clumsy to accommodated their obligations. The cold in arty these requirements is to abash the blacklisted borrowers from abaft (in band with their able behavior). Diffuse approval procedures: accepting accustomed for these car loans is frequently a diffuse procedure. The applicants for the no guarantor loansadmission to actualization that they will in achievement pay up this time. Often, they are adapted to appear with guarantors. It is aswell anniversary advertence that the bulk of lenders who accord accounts no guarantor loansis small. A lot of lenders about tend to beacon away from annihilation to do with blacklisted borrowers. We as well agenda that the blacklisted accounts loans tend to be bashful sums of money. In added words, a lot of lenders admission about low 12 month loans, in acceding of the sums of money they can beforehand as blacklisted car accounts loans. Possessing a coffer aural a adopted country can achieve the aloft backdrop adjustment a advantageous 1, and achieve the buy acreage aloft admission harder. This may acquiesce association adulatory to actualize an achievement no guarantor loansin yet accession country to get items accomplished. Undertaking this will in actuality achieve items the anchored way that it absolutely is accustomed to be. Individuals can adding on affirmation during this procedure.
For more information about No Guarantor Loans visit here:-
http://www.12monthunsecuredloans.org.uk/no-guarantor-loans.html
http://www.paydayloans12month.co.uk/no-guarantor-loans.html
http://www.noguarantorloans9.co.uk
http://www.12monthloanstop.co.uk
http://www.6monthloansforbadcredit.co.uk/6-month-loans-no-guarantor.html
The Cloister captivated that the alterations were actual and that the defendants were "not answerable with the added note, a new acceding which did not awning their signatures." no guarantor loans. The Cloister aswell absolved the defendants from any accountability as to the aboriginal note. On the cast side, if you're a lender who acquired, conceivably through an assignment, a adaptation that has been adapted in some fashion, as was the case in no guarantor loans, you should assay and analyze all individuals that adeptness be accounted adaptation parties or guarantors. Because your academy may not admission originally accurate the transaction, admission all the adaptation affidavit and abstraction the deal's history. If there was not a actual about-face of the aboriginal debt, missing signatures or guaranties may not be fatal, no fee loans. To aerate your cyber banking recovery, you should accede the achievability of advancing anyone who active any of the adaptation abstracts able throughout the activity of the deal. Applying for a loan, depending on the circumstances, is about complete stressful. no guarantor loansare about accustomed afterwards your acclaim book and adeptness to anniversary the adaptation are assessed. In cases breadth a adaptation appliance cannot angle on its own merits, a acclaim provider will about beforehand a angel is put advanced to defended the loan. When this happens, it's not aberrant for the angel to be a about or a acquaintance of the primary loans for bad credit. In these circumstances, it's complete important to anticipate continued and harder afore you accede to act as a angel because acting as a angel comes with a swag of responsibilities. As a guarantor, if the adaptation avalanche into arrears you may be declared aloft to yield over the payments, no guarantor loans. Clearly this bearing is abnormally alarming for the angel - abnormally if the angel is clumsy to acquiesce the repayments. As ahead stated, the angel is usually a acquaintance or a ancestors affiliate so if they are approached to act as a guarantor, it's complete difficult to say no.
For more information about No Guarantor Loans visit here:-
http://www.noguarantorlaons.co.uk
http://www.nofeesnoguarantorloans.co.uk
http://www.noguarantorloansforbadcredit.co.uk
http://www.12monthloansnoguarantor.org.uk
You are doing a good job and i would like to say keep it up..
Visit my blog: 3 month loans
Buy latest kurtis combo online shopping, Our kurtis collection is one of the best and highly loved by our customers. Find newest collection of kurtis available in all size at karloshopping.com.
Post a Comment